Here’s who I am, what I’m about and what I’m about to do these next twelve months

Photo by Scott Graham on Unsplash

Hello, this is me, keypressingmonkey. Nice to meet you here in this my tiny corner of the interwebs.

Who I am

I am a programmer by day, creative writer by night and an avid outdoorsman and craftsman on the weekends.

That means that I will spend the good days outside, and when the weather is bad or the sun won’t shine I sit at a desk writing or coding.

My Most Popular Articles

What I’m working on in 2021

The second half of 2020 was a pretty good few months for me personally with a new job, growing side income and plenty of motivation to go around and try things.

In 2021 I…


From meeting smarter people to writing, programming helped me in more ways than just financially

Man standing with arms spread out on top of rock
Man standing with arms spread out on top of rock
Photo by Grant Ritchie on Unsplash.

Most people know exactly one thing about programming: It has the potential to pay well. But money is only one part of the freedom that it has afforded me. It has also completely changed my trajectory and outlook on life.

Programming Isn’t the Worst Career To Stumble Into

I had never even thought about becoming a programmer. I just applied to a listing, got invited to an assessment centre, then got hired. It was too good an opportunity to pass up, and I seriously had no plan at all for my life, so I shrugged and showed up for work.

That is not the usual origin story of…


And sprint reviews are pillow talk

Photo by Mateus Campos Felipe on Unsplash

I had way too much fun writing this post, if you have even half as much fun reading you’re in for a treat. Or a tacky mess you wish you could forget. You never know until the morning after.

So, here’s why programming is like sex, totally.

You have either too much or too little of it

Either you’re starved, or stuffed. Finding the balance point is almost impossible, and never more than a fleeting moment.

One day you are swamped in work, the next three years you are thoroughly underworked. Think about quitting, both the job and programming itself, but then something always keeps you going just a little…


Time to get dem gainz while nobody can stop you

Photo by Domenico Loia on Unsplash

Let me pain(t) you a picture: You sit there, Monday, Wednesday, in your chair, yet another meeting. Someone is planning something, someone else is busy with knowledge multiplication, a third time your boss is showing the presentation he already showed to those in charge. You know, life.

What if, however, you could take all those meetings where you are totally optional, yet somehow required to attend and use them well, use them to get your body in shape? …


All the drama that’s currently going on misses the point

Photo by Jonas Weckschmied on Unsplash

There’s a good chance you may not be aware of just how impactful the past month and a bit has been for Medium and us, the readers and writers. Let me quickly summarize: Big publications are no longer the focus, their funding cut (and likely diverted to us individual authors through that care package cheque), now the recent news is that PSILY is shutting down (and I never got the chance to get a piece published there, damn it!).

The editorial team got bought out, new figures added to the leadership roster, plenty of tech updates under the hood.

Just…


A lesson in keeping your ego out of the equation

Photo by Green Chameleon on Unsplash

I could be retired today, not even have to work on the enjoyable projects. Pick my poisons rather than my cures. If only I had learned earlier to stay in line with my writing skills at the time. If some rare presence out there had taken pity with me and pointed my focus in the right direction.

But instead, I got lost in the whirlwind of trying to break out of the “creative constraints”. I tried to get out of the path that so clearly presented itself. …


This may just be your most important skill to perfect

Bike under a bridge
Bike under a bridge
My teacher once told me I’d end up under a bridge. Photo by the author.

It is hardly a secret that many of us programmers spend a lot of time at our desks — likely more than just eight hours per day. Gaming is fun, but that’s six more hours of sitting and staring at a screen after eight hours of doing the very same thing. Working on your own coding projects can add an extra few hours to an already long day.

There is a very real chance of working yourself into a rabbit hole to various, worrisome degrees. I sure spent some good hours farming the crypts in Act I, and I have…


I never get so much done, so quickly then when I’m escaping my past self.

Photo by OSPAN ALI on Unsplash

Have you ever heard the sentence “There is no stronger believer than a recent convert”? That is one of my favorite quotes, always has been since I first read it. Funnily enough, my interpretation of it has changed over the years, I now read it as a statement more along the lines of “when the student is ready, the teacher will present themself”.

When I look back at my life I find that it is clearly cyclic, with shortening cycles between drastic changes. I moved quite often, always leaving behind a whole world and taking very little with me into…


The ultimate programmer’s guide to social life

Photo by Christopher Campbell on Unsplash

The pandemic has taught us all a thing or two about life — such as that people are really just JSON files wrapped in a nice frontend. Slightly confusing to look at, potentially infinite layers of hidden depth — and if they are missing a bracket on either end of the file they quickly fall apart and become unreadable.

It is such profound wisdom that I acquired during the past year-that-felt-like-a-decade. Plenty of nuggets that I’m about to share with you, whether you want it or not.

Nobody bothered to document the code

And if they did, it’s grossly out of date.

Sometimes you look at…


Just a few fun lines that made me yell at random things on my desk

Man breaking stone with punch
Man breaking stone with punch
Photo by Damir Spanic on Unsplash.

Coding is a lot of fun — usually. Sometimes you just sit there and wonder if this line of code was really worth all the trouble that it caused. You wonder if you should just resign, call it a day, take that sweet paycheck, and invest it into all the booze from the local corner store.

Here are three particular examples that looked harmless on their own but cost me a day or even a week of my life.

;commit;

Let’s start with an easy one: SQL scripts that somebody else wrote. Personally, I always made use of the Commit button…

keypressingmonkey

Programmer by day, creative writer by night. Get my spreadsheet full of freelance writing resources that help me earn money: http://eepurl.com/g0OZaX

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